Tales of Symphonia and Kingdom Hearts Crossover!
by The-3-Sueslayers
Summary: This Fanfiction is pure CRACK!  It has no plot whatsoever!  Read it if you need a good laugh!By: Sueslayer 1! Chapter 4 now up! Warning: Please R&R or I might stop posting chapters!
1. Fangirls After Riku!

Tales of Symphonia and Kingdom Hearts Crossover

This is Sue Number 1. I hope you enjoy my fanfic.

I do not own Tales of Symphonia and Kingdom Hearts Characters. Please send lots of reviews!

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Riku stared at the blackboard in front of him but not really paying attention to it. Their teacher was boring him and many other people as he could see around him. He was talking about Pascals Triangle and how he liked Dairy Queen or something like that.

Raine noticed that Riku wasn't really paying attention.

"RIKU! PAY ATTENTION FOR ONCE DAMN IT!" Raine the teachers pet had become angry and thrown a flaming punch at the daydreaming Riku.

"Owww! What did I do!" Riku suddenly snapped back to reality.

"You were Day Dreaming!" Raine screamed at top of her lungs. She was so frightening that her little brother Genis was cowering under his desk out of fear.

Zelos was staring at Larxene careful not to be noticed. Larxene however saw this and so did the rest of the class.

"Stop staring at me!" Larxene screamed and the person beside her covered his ears.

"Ummm I wasn't staring…" Zelos trailed off.

"Damn it you were staring you lying pervert!" Larxene was angry and everyone but Zelos knew not to mess with Larxene.

Zelos was twitching on the floor and he was moaning in pain saying "MOMMY!" Larxene had kicked Zelos where the light never shines 100,000 times in not even 5 minutes. Demyx was watching this all in amusement eating cookies at the same time when all of a sudden Axel messed up his hair with a bucket full of water that he got from who knows where and Saix had swiped his cookies.

"MY Hair! Those cookies are mine Saix!" Demyx was crying now. Saix had got away safely but axel on the other hand was laughing at Demyx's idiotic hair.

"AXELLLLLL!" Demyx was suddenly giving Axel the scariest death glare of all time and the whole class was cheering for the now scary Demyx who was a cry baby a couple minutes ago.

"Ummm it was an accident? Hehehe…" Axel was backing into a wall with a frightening Demyx who looked ready to commit murder.

"DANCE WATER DANCE!" Demyx shouted. She only people who didn't seem to notice this event were Zexion because he was sitting in the corner minding his own business as always, Marluxia who was tending to flowers in the classroom. Xemnas who was writing down plans for Sora's Demise, Sora who was staring at Xemnas and his evil plans that always backfired, Xaldin who was ignoring everyone and Saix who was out of the classroom running down the hallways and back to his single dorm to hide the cookies.

Riku could feel people staring at him… He turned around and saw red scary bloodshot eyes staring at him and Zexion. Zexion hurried into another room and waited for these people who were clearly fangirls and shut a door in their faces. This caused them all to fall back and tangle together in a mess that they couldn't find their way out of. Zexion locked himself in the room and read a book.

Riku ran for dear life. "OH GOD SAVE MEEE!!!"

He screamed so much that nearby windows broke in response.


	2. RiceBall Battle!

This is SueSlayer 1 again. I hope you enjoyed my first chapter of this crack fiction. After you view please review!

Note: I do not own Kingdom hearts or Tales of Symphonia Characters.

Chapter 2

Riku was running for dear life from rabid fangirls with bloodthirsty red eyes.

"GOD SAVEEE MEEEEE" Riku screamed so much that windows shattered in response.

He darted around a corner of the school and ran as fast as he could. Collette was walking down the hall and saw Riku being chased by rabid fangirls. She didn't look and fell down flat on her face. Riku jumped over Collette and continued running whereas the fangirls tripped over Collette one after another and this caused a domino effect and all the fangirls were tangled up and were in a line. Surprisingly no one seemed to land on Collette.

"Oh my! Im so sorry im very clumsy! Are you ok?" She asked the fangirls.

"RIKU IS GETTING AWAY! CALL RIENFORCEMENTS!" the fangirl who seemed to be the leader called someone else with a cellphone.

Riku continued running. He was grateful for Collete's clumsiness but he knew they would call reinforcements.

I wonder what you all think the teacher is doing at this time.

"As I was saying I love Dairy Queen and McDonalds!" The teacher who was supposed to be taking about Pascal's triangle said. It seemed he didn't care that his students were either causing an uproar or were no where to be seen so he continued on his random talk.

Saix ran to his dorm and placed the cookies under his bed.

"HAHA! More sweets to add to my secret stash!" He said as he looked at his bed that was filled with sweets. It looked like an avalanche of sweets was going to occur at the slightest touch. Saix ran back to the classroom and halted outside the door. He watched people in the classroom and looked to see if there were anymore sweets to swipe.

Riku was still running. He ran inside the gymnasium and saw Genis, Lloyd, Sheena, Kairi, Namine and his best friend Sora sitting behind a hill of boxes that poofed up from no where.

"WTF!? Where did the boxes come from??" Riku said.

"SHHHH! Riku come behind the hill of boxes we have come to save you from the rabid bloodthirsty fangirls!!!!!" Sora said as he ushered Riku to come behind the boxes.

Behind the boxes a huge pile of who knows how many Riceballs appeared out of no where!

"WTF IS WITH ALL THIS STUFF POOFING OUT OF MID AIR!" Riku screamed!

"Ummmmm" Kairi was thinking of an answer to Riku's Question

"I think this is the author's doing! But even though this defy's all laws of gravity and stuff I guess it is pretty convenient!" Namine said.

"THE RABID FANGIRLS HAVE COME!" Genis screamed a warlike cry.

"BRING IT ON!" Sheena said with a death glare pointed at every single fangirl.

"MUAHAHAHA I MAY BE A SLACKER BUT THROWING RICEBALLS AT RABID FANGIRLS ARE MY SPECIALTY!" Lloyd said as he looked like an insane maniac throwing riceballs.

"Oh well might as well use the riceballs…" Riku shrugged his shoulders and started throwing the riceballs at fangirls.

One by one the fangirls fell down but they got back up with sheer perseverance.

"F Are they Zombies! I SHALL KEEP TRYING ANYWAYS F THEM!" Sheena screamed as she swore very loudly.

All of a sudden Zexion appeared in the corner of a room.

"What am I doing here?" He asked himself outloud

"ermmm Namine is this the author's doing again?" Genis asked as he was still flinging riceballs.

"I think so… But why call Zexion?" Namine asked.

"Oh well might as well get out of here." Zexion said as he brought out his spell book and a giant hand appeared out of no where and squashed all the fangirls.

Next an invisible wall appeared and parted the fangirls.

"NOOOOO DON'T LEAVE ZEXIONNNN!!!!" fangirls who were chasing him and got squished by the hand cried.

Zexion left and there was no more invisible walls and hands to squish the fangirls. All of the fangirls were unconscious now. There were so many all squished together in a giant pile that they blocked the entrance and exit.

"errr how are we going to get out of here now?" Sora asked.

"Does that mean we are snowed in except instead of snow there are fangirls blocking the way?" Riku asked.

"I think so…" The rest of them replied.


	3. Revenge through Marly's Garden

This is SueSlayer 1. Please R&R if you have comments or suggestions. I will try to update whenever I have the chance! Please enjoy

Note: I do not own Kingdom Hearts or Tales of Symphonia characters!

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Last Chapter

_errr how are we going to get out of here now?" Sora asked._

"_Does that mean we are snowed in except instead of snow there are fangirls blocking the way?" Riku asked._

"_I think so…" The rest of them replied._

Chapter 3

While everyone was thinking of a way to get out of the "snowed in gymnasium" Marluxia was tending to flowers in an outdoor garden but when he got there leaves were everywhere, roses had been cut from a bush and a note said "THIS was my doing! Signed AXEL" Marluxia was cursing Axel and then he heard screaming from inside the gym. These screams were from Sora and co. yelling at the fangirls who were unconscious and blocking entrance's and exits. Marluxia didn't know this and went to check on it.

"DAMN YOU THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT STUPID FANGIRLS!" Sheena was cursing.

"F YOU FANGIRLS STOP CHASING US AROUND AND YOU WONT GET INTO THIS MESS!" Kairi was also swearing surprisingly.

"Wait a second… it was the fangirls fault mostly but wasn't it Zexion's fault too for leaving us behind?" Genis questioned.

"Oh my! It is!" Namine said with surprise.

"Hehehe! Let us get revenge on Zexion… That way we can call it even" Lloyd said sneakily.

"I say revenge is wrong and we should have asked for the help!" Namine the idealist said.

Marluxia was listening and he didn't think Zexion was fun to torture but Axel on the other hand…. HE WAS FUN TO TORTURE and he did have a reason for revenge… Now if he gave a hand to these people he could convince them not to take revenge on Zexion but to take revenge on Axel… After all why take revenge if it isn't satisfying!

Meanwhile…

Demyx was running away as far as he could from Marluxia's outdoor garden with a black marker in his hand.

"I hope Marluxia didn't see me write that letter and sign Axel's name… At least it looks like Axel's printing! MUAHAHAHA he shall pay for ruining my precious hair with bucket full of water!" Demyx said softly.

Back in front of the gymnasium…

Marluxia had made a corridor of darkness and was throwing fangirls inside the portal and teleporting them to the school nurse because they were unconscious.

Sora, Riku, Genis, Sheena, Kairi, Namine and Lloyd had seen light entering the gymnasium in an angelic way with a dark figure with spiky hair standing at the doorway.

"is…is that an angel?" Genis asked.

"oooohhh Ahhhhhhh!" the rest of them observed.

Now they could see Marluxia clearly.

"WTF ITS MARLUXIA" Riku screamed

"shouldn't you be tending to your flowers at this time?" Namine asked

"Well you see that's just the thing… Axel ruined them and he left my garden in a complete mess. He even had enough guts to put a note there that was clearly in his printing and it said "signed Axel" Marluxia said sadly.

"Well we are talking about Marluxia so… he would only help us for his OWN benefit… You want us to take revenge don't you. Even if it wasn't Axel I guess it is okay for revenge since he has been playing pranks on us since we first came to this school…" Genis stated the facts with resentful expression toward Axel.

"I guess you are right! AXEL NEEDS A TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDICINE!" Namine the usually gentle idealist replied

"Wow even the gentle idealist agreed!" The rest of them seemed amused.

Meanwhile… Demyx was watching what Marluxia would do and he was correct. He would find help and help someone in exchange for something.

"Axel is going to get a taste of his own medicine… Now I just have to act normal and wait for them to ask me to help them… hehehe" Demyx said


	4. Two Xigbars?

Sorry for the previous chapters where there was no Kratos but he is in this one It's really hard to fit him in with a school setting but I managed and he is indeed a student in this one and not Lloyd's dad but his friend and this chapter is mainly Kratos to make up for the other chapters! Enjoy! Please R&R or I might stop posting.

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_Last Chapter_

_Demyx was watching what Marluxia would do and he was correct. He would find help and help someone in exchange for something._

"_Axel is going to get a taste of his own medicine… Now I just have to act normal and wait for them to ask me to help them… hehehe" Demyx said_

Chapter 4

Kratos was sitting in the corner of the classroom thinking of a plan to get away from those stupid fangirls who stalk him when all of a sudden Zexion was standing in front of him.

"What do you want Zexion?" Kratos said

"I want you to get out of my corner" Zexion answered coolly

"Why you don't own them Zexion" Kratos said

"Infact I do Kratos" Zexion took a piece of parchment out of his pocket that was indeed the title deed for all corners and dark unused rooms in the school.

"Wtf its official and everything! Where did you get that?" Kratos asked

"The principal gave it to me in exchange for helping him tutor the stupid fangirls who just wanted my attention in the end" He said simply

"and you aren't bothered by that?" Kratos asked

"I would yell at fangirls and ask them to just shut up and learn for the deed because I'm killing two birds with one stone." He said

"I see" Kratos said as he walked away

"Good bye" He said as he walked into a dark and unused room

Kratos could feel those creepy bloodshot red eyes staring at him. They belonged to none other that rabid fangirls. He needed a plan fast to get away from them at least even for a little while. He had a plan.

Kratos darted and ran into Vexen's lab. It wasn't really his lab but Vexen stayed there all the time so everyone just called it his lab.

"VEXEN I NEED YOU TO MAKE ME A POTION TO GET THOSE DAMN FANGIRLS AWAY FROM ME! I NEED THEM TO STOP STALKING ME! EVEN FOR A LITTLE BIT!" Kratos Cursed.

"Fine, fine… I have something in mine and I will have some benefit too… since I need more data on this one particular potion" Vexen said.

"Tell me what the potion does…" Kratos said

"Well you see it can turn you into a person of your choice… I think a good person to turn into would be Xigbar. Not many girls hang out with him because of his idiotic attitude and skunk like hair on the other hand you wont be lonely because he has many friends. You will change back in 1 weeks time, if that is how much "break" you require?" Vexen asked and explained.

"That will be fine" He said

Kratos exited the room as Xigbar and had even tied around an eye patch so that he won't seem suspicious. Something bad happened in the next couple minutes though. Xigbar had seen him and was staring at him as if he had gone mad.

"Am I seeing things?" Xigbar said as he looked at Kratos.

He thought it was best to explain to Xigbar so that Xigbar would help him and then we would know what time each Xigbar should be outside not hiding.


End file.
